Lawdog's national endeavor to expand the public's knowledge of the arts and crafts

Lawdog1521Lawdog1521 Squirrel Chasing Expert
edited June 2012 in Less Rokk More Talk
Welcome to LNEEPKAC, or Lawdog's national endeavor to expand the public's knowledge of the arts and crafts. Today we'll be delving into the wonderful world of Macram

Comments

  • dragoninforcerdragoninforcer UnWashed
    edited June 2012
    This is ****ing brilliant.
  • bigmfbigmf Tiny Hulk Smash!
    edited June 2012
    I was with you all the way and excited about this project, then that damned Yothers gives me a limp lifeless handshake and ****ed it up.
  • Lawdog1521Lawdog1521 Squirrel Chasing Expert
    edited June 2012
    bigmf;4775081 said:
    I was with you all the way and excited about this project, then that damned Yothers gives me a limp lifeless handshake and ****ed it up.

    That's what makes it so much harder a craft than say... macaroni paintings.
  • dragoninforcerdragoninforcer UnWashed
    edited June 2012
    I followed the directions, but when I knitted all the stuff, I must've messed up somewhere because this was the outcome.

    I'm not very good at Macram
  • Lawdog1521Lawdog1521 Squirrel Chasing Expert
    edited June 2012
    [QUOTE=dragoninforcer;4775087]I followed the directions, but when I knitted all the stuff, I must've messed up somewhere because this was the outcome.

    I'm not very good at Macram
  • jibjqrkljibjqrkl Eventually Perceptive
    edited June 2012
    i just blew up my house by doing this ;_;
  • Lawdog1521Lawdog1521 Squirrel Chasing Expert
    edited June 2012
    jibjqrkl;4775100 said:
    i just blew up my house by doing this ;_;

    That's why I said a "Pinch of paprika". That stuff should be treated with respect.
  • bigmfbigmf Tiny Hulk Smash!
    edited June 2012
    Damn you, Yothers!
  • Lawdog1521Lawdog1521 Squirrel Chasing Expert
    edited June 2012
    dragoninforcer;4775102 said:

    If I was a teacher and you drew this in school, I'd refer you to a counselor.
  • jibjqrkljibjqrkl Eventually Perceptive
    edited June 2012
    Lawdog1521;4775103 said:
    That's why I said a "Pinch of paprika". That stuff should be treated with respect.

    I did!!!!

    maybe my handshake with Tina wasn't firm enough ;_;
  • dragoninforcerdragoninforcer UnWashed
    edited June 2012
    jibjqrkl;4775126 said:
    I did!!!!

    maybe my handshake with Tina wasn't firm enough ;_;

    No, that's not it.

    Are you sure you had a "bunch" of yarn? Or did you accidentally get a "lot" of yarn?
  • jibjqrkljibjqrkl Eventually Perceptive
    edited June 2012
    dragoninforcer;4775131 said:
    No, that's not it.

    Are you sure you had a "bunch" of yarn? Or did you accidentally get a "lot" of yarn?

    /facepalm

    i can't believe i made that mistake!
  • www1221www1221 StackOverflowError
    edited June 2012
    Dont worry its a rookie mistake. You can always build a new house with this newly found skill
  • bigmfbigmf Tiny Hulk Smash!
    edited June 2012
    Now I see the problem. This was a National endeavor rather than an international endeavour. I never stood a chance.
  • daxx1970daxx1970 110% Awesome
    edited June 2012
    I was out all day and by the time I got to Tina Yother's house she had carpal tunnel from bigmf's kung-fu grip handshake. I had to settle for a kiss on the check from Blossom's Mayim Bialik. I was able to make this though.

    I look forward to next week's project and will endeavor to get here on time.


    Edit: I must have done something right. I wore this to a gas station and they just handed me money...they didn't even take the art. County fair here I come!
  • ClaptonsWigClaptonsWig I Can't Dance
    edited June 2012
    I'm kind of creeped out, Mac and Me is playing right now while I read that list. In a good way, means my day is destined to be doing owls.
  • daxx1970daxx1970 110% Awesome
    edited June 2012
    7 more things and you are making art! Word of warning, it has to be on VHS, Jibs blew up her house using the DVD version.
  • rkbdgurlrkbdgurl Road Warrior
    edited June 2012
    daxx1970;4775421 said:
    I was out all day and by the time I got to Tina Yother's house she had carpal tunnel from bigmf's kung-fu grip handshake. I had to settle for a kiss on the check from Blossom's Mayim Bialik. I was able to make this though.

    I look forward to next week's project and will endeavor to get here on time.


    Edit: I must have done something right. I wore this to a gas station and they just handed me money...they didn't even take the art. County fair here I come!
    LOL ....I think daxx should move to the head of the class.
  • darkwinterbeast8darkwinterbeast8 Headliner
    edited June 2012
    dragoninforcer;4775102 said:

    I made a drawing similar to that in grade school, except mine had more blood and gore in it. Needless to say, my music teacher wasn't happy I used their attendance book to draw it.
  • MarlboroMarlboro Road Warrior
    edited June 2012
    How did I miss this. :(
  • jibjqrkljibjqrkl Eventually Perceptive
    edited June 2012
  • dragoninforcerdragoninforcer UnWashed
    edited June 2012
    [QUOTE=jibjqrkl;4781241]Macram
  • jibjqrkljibjqrkl Eventually Perceptive
    edited June 2012
    dragoninforcer;4781246 said:

    i never claimed to be original.

    and like you're ever original with your lame naked pic!
  • Lawdog1521Lawdog1521 Squirrel Chasing Expert
    edited June 2012
    dragoninforcer;4781246 said:

    How do you know she's not Vivienne Foley?
  • Lawdog1521Lawdog1521 Squirrel Chasing Expert
    edited June 2012
    Crochet! No, it’s not a country next to Czechoslovakia. Well, it could be but that doesn’t concern us right now. What I’m referring to is the wonderful art of darning together fabric to produce everything from ugly sweaters to toilet paper cozies. Crochet proves yarn isn’t just for kittens and kinky sex acts., instead it offers us an outlet of artistic expression rivaled only by Sock Monkeys.

    What’s the difference between crochet and knitting you ask? One uses razor sharp, foot long needles and the other uses razor sharp, foot long hooks. Knot only (get it!?!) do hooks allow fancier work but provide an excellent means to catching halibut while ice fishing.

    Crochet originated in France, where it was originally called “Crotch It!” In 1526 the King of France commissioned a new form of loin cloth be created. An impoverished seamstress by the name of Jean Marie only had a pair of rusty hooks for hands, as times were tough in France. Using said hooks she would fashion a dandy, multicolored piece of wool that would become fashionable covering French genitals and pave the way for the abundant uses of crochet we have today.

    For today’s project we will need the following:

    1. A pair of rusty hooks. (Rusty Hooks also serves well as an alias)

    2. A ball of yarn.

    3. 36 cotton swabs, some used, some not.

    4. A road atlas detailing lower New Mexico. (preferably Rand Mcnally)

    5. 2 Chicken Chalupas from Taco Bell.

    6. A statement with the credit history of comedian Jim J. Bullock.

    7. 4 of those tiny screws that hold the battery cover on the back of a Harmonix Fender guitar controller. (If you drop one, good luck finding it in the carpet.)

    Take the yarn and hooks. Throw them in the garbage and go shopping for clothes at the mall. Enjoy!
  • WitticusWitticus VERY DEEP
    edited June 2012
    Only came up with this.

    My wife said it's a scarf with a ceiling hook attachment.
  • Lawdog1521Lawdog1521 Squirrel Chasing Expert
    edited June 2012
    Scarfs are convenient for serial killers who left their murder weapons at home. (Convenient for them, not so much for you.)
  • bigmfbigmf Tiny Hulk Smash!
    edited June 2012
    Owwww! My eye! I'm not supposed to get rusty hooks in it.
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